I forgot this blog page even existed…

fioraslovenwellbeingLeave a comment

Hi! Good morning! Good afternoon! Good day to you!

I totally forgot this page even existed, life ever since my last blog has been emotionally, physically and mentally challenging. Literally, I am not even joking.

To begin, I lost my Dad back in June. To cancer. When I found out, it hit me my body sense, I was numb, emotionless and in denial. I felt like I could change it, reverse it somehow. No I couldn’t. I had to be there for him, for the rest of the upcoming months he will be with us. He didn’t have long, his GP said he will have a year to live. No biggie. When I’d finish work I’d go over there, get him his favourite meals, and we’d just talk and watch our shows like how we use to when we were young. Bittersweet feeling. I saw his health deteriorate day by day forgetting where he put his things and his car. He called me up one afternoon and said he forgot where he parked his car, when I pulled up to the shops, he looked so helpless, he didn’t know what to do. What hurt me most is that he always parked his car in his usual place. We decided since then he can not drive ever again. He passed away suddenly on the 12/06/2020. I planned to finish work early that day at 12pm to get him a wheel chair at a health care facility cause he could not walk anymore. When I finished work I called my brother telling him I will be getting the wheel chair for him now and see you both in 30 minutes. “Kim, no. He went.” – Kevin. My heart dropped, my conscious head switched off, tears starting to fall. I rushed home. RUSHED. I didn’t give no care in the world. I had to. It was a rainy day. I got home, I saw him laying there on his bed. Mum wrapped him up in his blanket, my dog laid so closely to him. Chanting music was on. Ugh. I feel like crap writing like this. Anyways, he’s sisters were there discussing funeral plans. I didn’t give a shit about that I just wanted to be with him there, until they took him away. Our head monk came and did his long prayers for him. He’s body got collected around 7:00pm, the lights outside our front yard never worked but when they carried his body out, the lights flicked on and ever since it’s been working.

His funeral was on the 17/06/2019 – 18/06/2020.

Life been then has been crazy, I think about him every single day. I am not even joking. What can we do? It’s life, we don’t have to move on, moving on his like forgetting his even there. No, I am going on. Life goes on.

Sitting Buddha image in lotus position on sky background. Symbol of Buddhism religion

Go with the flow..

fioraslovenwellbeingLeave a comment

Good morning, I hope all of you are well. I am (mostly because it’s going to be a long weekend).

Let’s have a little about ‘me’. I use to suffer from Anxiety and Depression. It started in 2015, I had a boyfriend then partner whom I thought would be the ‘one’ (we’ll get to that story another time). One day, on a Friday evening I came home from University and work, I was so tired I walked straight into my room and changed into my pajamas. Then I felt as if someone has hit me with a brick right on my chest, I felt so hard to breathe. I told my partner at the time, why? what’s happening to me? He told me it’s just a ‘phase’. How can it be a phase?

Days, weeks, months went on by, I felt like doing nothing. Absolutely nothing. Didn’t want to go to work, didn’t want to go back to studying, and I didn’t even want to go out and see people. That’s when I knew, I fell into something I would of never imagined; depression. I felt useless, I felt I owed something to the world, but I didn’t, it was all in my head. When I would try to talk to my partner he would brush me off; ‘There’s no such feeling in the world. You just need to keep working’. I thought to my self, I’ve been working, and studying at the same time, when I come home its different? It went on like this for years.

Only until last year April 2018, I realised something. I knew the reason. Unfortunately, we broke up in May when I started my new job. I wanted a new start, and it was a great feeling. I felt so positively good, in a couple of months I felt as if was on top of the world. (Cliche, I know.). I get so excited for the weekends now, because I can do and go wherever I like!

I have overcomed depression, I’ve let go what was hurting me, let go what was dragging me down, and brought in something that made my life alive. Anxiety and Depression will always be a part of me, I know some days throughout my entire I will feel it, but now I know what I need to do. Sometimes when I feel like my chest is tight, I make myself a bath, rub Organic Lavender oil onto my temples, and let the bubbles soak into my skin whilst I watch Netflix.

I believe that you can do it too, let go what’s hurting you, let go what’s bringing you down, bring in the positive light that you deserve. You’re more worth it then anyone can ever tell you. Don’t dwell on the downside of things. There are so many options out there, search, and you’ll be surprised. Your inner core is worth it.

Love, Kim

Free moment

fioraslovenwellbeingLeave a comment

Okay, let’s do the real deal here. It is so cold today! Currently having morning tea outside for fresh air, why not, when the office gets stuffy sometime with heating on 24 degrees C.

Woke up today feeling a little tired, even though I had 7.5 hours. Maybe I’ve been awoken during my deep sleep cycle – mind you it wasn’t a very deep sleep as oppose to other nights.

So far, it’s been a busy morning, I’ve had half a spinach and turkish roll bread with a side of X50 Green Tea Raspberry flavour to get my morning commute going.

I’m wondering to my self, why am I typing up my feelings right now during my morning tea instead of taking a glimpse outside, watching people walk by, having their morning coffees, running, chit chatting.. I know why, because this feels good. I’m somewhat unclogging my mind and emptying my mind before walking into my office and complete my final task. Ahh, you know what, it feels great when you have some space in your mind. No matter where you are, working at a cafe, working at a construction site, working in an office, driving on road. Remember to take a break, ease out and have some space in your head. Even if it’s just for 5 minutes, it will help you so much. Have a free moment. Relax. Enjoy.

How do you free your headspace sometimes? How are you feeling today? Comment below or email me at friorashealthnwellbeing@hotmail.com.

Love, Kim

Melbourne, Australia 5/6/2019 11:00am

Let’s get started

fioraslovenwellbeingLeave a comment

Hi! I’m not sure how to begin, with many typos and backspace I’ve finally found a way to start. My name is Kim, I’m Australian-Asian, oh and 23 years old, (24 in 3 months time..yes!..). I just wanted to say firstly, welcome and in this blog you will get to see my side of the story; where I forecast my emotions and journal my life in a day. So how did I began thinking to start a blog?? I sat in work today, quietly and thought to myself, hmm should I start a blog where I can express my self and also encourage others to express themselves too? I’m a Mental Health Geek(?)… I love hearing peoples sides of stories, what they’re up to, what brings joy, sadness, anger, stress, sense of loss, you know every emotions. I have an email dedicated to this blog site, and you are always welcome to send me a story, a question or even what’s on your mind in one word, don’t worry – it’s all anonymous, because it’s only..me! I hope to build a relationship with each and every of you, why? We all need someone.

Love, Kim Lieu 4/6/19 7:29pm